May 9, 2017

Police Raid Tony "Acidrodent" Smith's Home, Find Cache of Stolen Art Supplies


SPRINGFIELD, IL—Local police have raided the home of Tony Smith, lead musician in the industrial metal band Acidrodent. Officials have stated that among an "inordinate amount of microwave hot dogs," they have found a large cache of stolen art supplies. Sources say a small amount of low-grade marijuana was also discovered at the scene.

The aforementioned art supplies include paint, rainbow glitter, and rubber cement. Sgt. Steve Duncan with the Springfield Police Department stated, "A significant amount of the items we've recovered have women's names on them. We ask that anyone with any information contact our tip line."

A state-wide investigation is on its way to find the rightful owners of the art supplies. Smith was released from the Sangamon County jail on a signature bond, but initially refused to leave until after lunch had been served.

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