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February 28, 2020

Coronavirus Outbreak at Cyber Goth Rave Kills Zero


ISLINGTON, UK—The deadly Coronavirus has made its way to London. One small community, however, has somehow remained uninfected.


 An outbreak has rocked parts of the city, hitting peak infection numbers and several deaths over the weekend. One small community in the Islington District has somehow remained an outlier.

It has been determined by the CDC that much of the staff at a local nightclub in London's Islington District has contracted the virus. The club operates two to dance floors: an ebm/aggrotech room on the ground level and a darkwave/goth room on the top level. As fate would have it, on this particular night, the event had been downsized to only the ground level aggrotech floor due to several bartenders and a DJ being out sick.

All patrons have shown no symptoms and tested negative for Coronavirus, although about a third of the club's regulars have tested positive for gonorrhea. All infected staff have been hospitalized but are expected to make a full recovery.

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5 comments:

  1. a third of the club's regulars have tested positive for gonorrhea... Maybe Neisseria gonorrhoeae fights Coronavirus?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Replies
    1. �� Are you joking?

      Delete



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